I am quickly learning that Twins squabble and fight a lot (or at least mine do and from what I hear from other twin mums it does seem to be a common issue). I find that they will fight over anything and everything and they seem to do it way more than their Singleton brothers. I find the seemingly endless bickering agitating as it occurs at such a high pitch that it feels like my ears may bleed! So I have been thinking about ways to manage squabbling twins.
Advice from other Twins
In my quest to manage my squabbling twins I have sought the advice of other twins. I spoke to a set of teenager non ID girl twins and an adult set of identical girl twins and interestingly both said the same; never get in between a twin fight!
I have listened to this advice and try my very hardest to let them get on with it. The idea being that they have to learn to work it out. They need to establish their dynamic and set their own boundaries after all they are stuck together. However, I do draw the line when and if the claws really come out and they are pushing or hitting. I think that type of thing has to be dealt with (usually with a time out) so that they won’t do it to someone else outside of their sibling dynamic.
My ways of managing twin squabbling
- Ignore it and let them work it out
- Lead negotiations and try to broker a compromise (often futile)
- If they are being physical with one another then I break it up and the perpetrator has a little time out
- Distraction (when they are fighting over buggy space or whose sitting in which chair I find this works really well as there is always something more interesting than that fight)
- If they are repeatedly fighting over the same toy I just remove it but make sure that I have explained why it is going. I try and introduce it again a few minutes later and if they still don’t share away it goes again. This seems to get the message across – until the next time
What to do if none of that works?!
If all else fails and the squabbling still prevails I recommend hiding in the loo for a couple of mins and then sticking Peppa Pig on the tv to get some peace 😉😂