When you are a twin mummy there are certain things that well meaning strangers say to you at least a hundred times a day. Sometimes, especially when they are little its like being a z list celebrity. People stare a lot and often point. This happens most when they see me with all four littles. I can almost see people desperate to ask if they are two sets of twins and preparing to commiserate with me. Just for the record I am pretty happy about having created these gorgeous, noisy and slightly bonkers humans. I am fairly used to this over 2 years in to the world of being a mummy to multiples, but there are still some things that people say that make me want to tip over the edge!
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In a rational frame of mind you know that people don’t realise that they are the 13th person to say the very same thing that hour. As a reasonable human you realise that they don’t see that asking a perfect stranger about their ability to conceive naturally is irksome. You understand these things, but when you are running on twin mummy sleep levels its hard to not scream!
So here is my quick guide on things not to say to a twin mummy and why.
10 things not to say
- Are they Identical? (Fair enough if they look very similar, but if they are boy/ girl twins?? Can I suggest Mr or Mrs passer by that you first look at them before asking this)
- Are they twins? (not so annoying really)
- Are there twins in your family? (implied search into whether IVF was the source)
- Did you conceive naturally? (Really – to a stranger? Would I walk up to anyone else and ask did you have sex to make that baby?)
- You have your hands full! (We know – we were up with them all night and have spent the morning chasing them around the place. We know!)
- Twins on your 3rd time round. Unlucky! (that’s just rude)
- How great you got a girl amongst all those boys (awkward they are twin girls one just has short hair)
- You shouldn’t dress them alike (mind your business)
- You should dress them alike (see above comment)
- Don’t you look tired (AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!)
So next time you see a twin mummy tread carefully and if you really must say one of these things then look out for the signs that she is about to blow. Key indicators are gritted teeth, slight glint of crazy in the eyes and a very fake smile. Take cover – nothing hath fury like a twin mummy scorned!! You have been warned people.
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